If there were a picture to describe how the neurons and synapses in my brain fire, somedays I believe it would be an empty room full of cobwebs. Other days it would be like JFK airport (only not so dirty). So many changes have happened in the past few months, and a few days ago they all just seemed to process for me. It was like I forgot I was living a life. My life. And I have just been watching it all happen. Like JFK, I seem to get a little backed up in my thoughts, and there are occasionally some major delays. Through the monotony of job, boyfriend, sleep, repeat steps one through three 22 workdays out of the 31 days in a month, we forget how good we have it. Like that I have one of the funniest, most fabulous families on the face of the planet. That even when I don't see some of them but once a year or so, we can pick up where we left off and know if either of us needed anything, we would be there in a heartbeat to help out. I may have the best boyfriend in the whole world, who indulges me by feeding into my childhood fantasy of being a princess because he treats me like one every day. And I have probably taken much more than I have given from the relationship in the past and he has not once complained or stopped giving. My friends provide me with daily laughter and enjoyment and constantly remind me of who I am and cheer me on. I would say life rarely goes as expected, but God has been so good to me.
I am ready to go to bed, so I better wrap this thing up. I'll share an insight that struck me this past week. I was driving to church on Sunday and I had barely begun driving when I noticed the most hideous turkey buzzard eating some poor creature who must have had some rather poor luck the night before. This buzzard, to describe buzzards in Virginia terms, looks like it got straight beat with the ugly stick. They are big, and bristly, and all around nasty creatures. Not to mention they wait around to eat off of dead or dying creatures. Essentially they prey on animals who have already had a rough enough time. As I passed it thinking it must be one of the ugliest creatures in the world, I had the thought pop into my head... it may be the most ugly creature on the planet, but God loves it. It is a buzzard, it takes advantage over others, it is an insignificant, ugly as sin, bird. And God is mindful of it and loves it because it is one of his creations. Some days I don't feel like I am much better than a buzzard, sometimes I feel better than it, and somedays I feel like I am it, but God loves me. And He opened my eyes this week to so much. He helped me understand that even when we meet people who are like ugly turkey buzzards to us, He still loves them and expects us to do the same. Not just tolerate them, or pass them by, but to love them right on back. After finishing the book Mockingjay this week, I have just thought how much this world needs a little more love and kindness. And I am so grateful that this week I was finally able to see all the love and kindness I am surrounded by. When the whole world seems to be going crazy I am so glad that I can be grounded by the support of those around me. Thank you!