Because I am SO smart and have finished up my temporary job, I have decided to try my hand at different professions until one of them sticks and I find a new one. Today I have decided to try out the medical field and be a doctor. I know today is Sunday and I shouldn't be working, but hopefully the Big Man upstairs will understand. During my first few hours of my new profession I have discovered a new disease, and have decided to publish in my blog for now until I can submit it into a real medical journal. I discovered this disease, though not highly contagious, affects a large number of future brides, though age does not seem to play much of a factor. I have decided to call this new disease, Hapanxious Nervexcitis. You all may be wondering how I discovered this new disease and unfortunately, I discoverd it because I have it. (Don't worry, since I'm a doctor I self-diagnosed myself.)
So what is Hapanxious Nervexcitis?
It seems for the past two weeks I no longer attain the ability to sleep through the night because I have been so happy, slightly-anxious-that-everything-is-going-to-go-smoothly, nervous, and excited for the wedding (we'll just shorten the feeling to Hapanxiously Nervited). This plague can cause moodiness, nonsense ramblings, inability to focus, fatigue, extreme hunger and thirst, intestinal distress, and other symptoms not yet discovered.
The onset of this new disease, Hapanxious Nervexcitis, or HN, can begin suddenly during dating and last months until it is properly treated. Treatment plans include Tylenol PM, meditation podcasts, just getting up at 2 am every day and finding meaningless projects to occupy you until someone else wakes up (fortunately for me, my mom never sleeps so I usually don't have to wait too long), counting sheep, getting a glass of water, writing, reading, or JUST GETTING MARRIED ALREADY!
Not all brides will be affected as severely, but all those planning a wedding are highly likely to catch this malicious disease in some degree or another. If you would like to join this clinical study, or the support group, feel free to leave a comment below. As a doctor, I believe my HN is on the way out. I believe in 6 days it should begin to resolve itself, with flare ups only occurring with the onset of pregnancy, buying a home, or finding a new job. I hope all of you will be on the alert for this new disease and warn your friends about this trend. Early warning signs and diagnosis are usually the best way to successfully treat disease.
